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The Response-Able Parenting Newsletter 23
December 3, 2003


Welcome! This is a free newsletter on becoming a Response-Able parent, raising Response-Able children.



My mission is to strengthen families and improve parent communication skills (including my own), by helping parents learn practical, useable verbal strategies for raising responsible, caring, confident children.





1. Quote [back to top]


"Words that soak into your ears are whispered, not yelled."



2. Definition [back to top]


FULL NAME: What you call your child when you are mad at him or her.


3. Spirit Whisperer Contemplation [back to top]


Do you have a parenting problem that you are resisting? Could it be that resisting the problem is now the problem? Does it follow that if you stopped resisting the problem, you would no longer have it?


Subscriber comments, ideas, and concerns are valued. Email your

comment to


4. Bumper Sticker [back to top]


Spotted on a maroon minivan in Bay City, MI:



5. Make a Difference in Your Community [back to top]


Want to make a difference in your community? Want to do something meaningful for the parents and children in your church, school, or organization?

Join the growing number of people from around the world (USA, Mexico, Spain) who are learning how to help parents raise responsible, caring, confident children. We will help you learn to put the highly effective PARENT TALK skills into the hands of parents in your church, school, or organization.

You will leave this three-day training with the skills and confidence to touch the hearts and minds of parents in your community!

Parent Talk System Trainings:

Grand Rapids, MI February 5, 6, 7, 2004 Trainers: Chick Moorman and Sarah Knapp Contact: Chick Moorman at to request a detailed brochure and registration materials. Please include your mailing address.

"The training provided me with the tools, materials, and confidence to start my first training three days later." Donna Marie, Troy, MI

"You presented these parenting skills in a way that is easy to replicate. Thank you for helping us help the parents of our students." Janet Shaunfield, Houston, TX


6. Humor [back to top]


As they were on their way to church service, a Sunday school teacher asked her children, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?" One little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."


7. Fact [back to top]


Every 56 seconds a baby is born without health insurance.


Privacy Statement: Under no circumstances do we sell, trade, or exchange your email address, ever. It is safe with us. Always!


8. Food for Thought [back to top]


The Masai warriors of Africa greet one another with an interesting question: "How are the children?" The answer to this greeting is, "All the children are well." This custom bears witness to the high value the Masai place on the well-being of children. The verbal response "All the children are well" means that the Masai have not forgotten their responsibility to the youngest members of their society. Can we make the same claim?

Bob Cooper, Executive Director, NBA Tennyson Center for Children at Colorado Christian Home


9. Book Report [back to top]



Now until January 1st we are offering a special TALK package. PARENT TALK and COUPLE TALK can be purchased together for $30.00. These two highly acclaimed books cost $38.00 if purchased separately.

FREE postage to the first ten who order the HOLIDAY SPECIAL. Order by calling (toll-free) 877-360-1477 or email


10. Article: "A Different Kind of Christmas" [back to top]


By Sid Simon

I have a strong aversion to Christmases where kids dive under the tree, jerking their loot out, greedily tearing open packages and scattering the mess everywhere. Worse than that, by 10:00 a.m. they're bored. It's the way to raise what-did-you-buy-me/get-me/give-me children.

So what's the alternative? There's at least one, and when our children were little we tried it.

We changed the focus from the receiver to the giver. Each child would have a time set aside when he or she gave gifts to each member of the family. They could take as long as they wanted to, talking about how they chose what they were giving and why it was to be precious to the receiver.

After one person gave, we'd take time out for breakfast. Then another child would get to be the "giver." Then we'd often go for a walk, and when we came back one of the kids would play the role of "giver" for an absent aunt or other relative. The child would play the aunt, mimicking her accent or her moralizing way of talking, and explain why she sent what she sent. Sometimes it was hilarious - even downright disrespectful - but it was always playful and fun.

And so the day went, with long stretches in between the gift giving.

Finally, well after dinner, Mom and Dad would get the chance to give the presents we'd accumulated for the brood. We both tried to make with our own hands at least one gift for each child. That in itself was worth celebrating.

Christmas at out house, when the kids were little, was long and sweet. I hope they remember it the way I do: filled with family and filled with the spirit of giving rather than with the acquisition of loot. Isn't that the way it should be?

(From "Where the Heart Is: Stories of Home and Family," edited by Chick Moorman. Available through Personal Power Press for $14.95. Call (toll-free) 877-360-1477 or email


11. We Get Email [back to top]


Hello Chick,

I have been to two of your speaking engagements and enjoyed them greatly! I went right home each time and implemented the Parent Talk you taught us. I thought you might enjoy what happened to me this last time.

I have a four-year-old son named Michael. He was sitting on the floor "trying" to put his shoes on. After a few attempts he said, "I can't put them on, Mom." I was about to assure him that he could and tell him to "try" again when I remembered the Parent Talk language you gave us at the seminar. So I told him, "Michael, act as if you can."

He gave me a strange look, so I added, "Pretend like you can put them on, Michael." Michael laughed right out loud and replied, "Mom, I can't pretend."

"Why not?" I asked.

His response? "Because this is for real, Mom."

It was so cute, I laughed out loud, and then helped him with his shoes.

Thought you might enjoy this story,
Michael's Mother

Hello, Michael's Mother,

Thank you for sending the story. I enjoyed it immensely.

I salute you for implementing. One of the things we have learned about adult learners, whether attending a seminar or reading a book: the sooner they go back and implement any one thing, the greater chance they will implement more. The longer they wait before they implement anything, the greater the chance they will implement nothing.

Best wishes for successful implementation.
Chick Moorman


12. Managing Your subscription [back to top]


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To find out more about workshops, seminars, and keynote addresses presented by Chick Moorman contact him at toll free, 877/360-1477 or email


Copyright 2003 Chick Moorman Seminars, all rights reserved. Share this with your circle.


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